I only post when I'm sad..

I know that I only blog when I'm feeling sad or angry. But I like to write the bad feelings out

This week has been hell
 First I found out that I was losing my 4 10s.
Then I get TWO big bills. One for my hospital stay months ago and another for my dental bill..
and then last but not least.. I found out that a friend had been dating my ex.

Its stupid to care about someone whos lied to you and let you down so many times, but it makes me mad that he would weasel his way in to a friend of mines bad situation and take advantage of her when she is vulnerable.
but another part of me feels incredibly betrayed by her. Shes heard me cry about him.. shes talked shit on him and then she goes and is with him. I know she feels bad but really? You know how I feel about this guy.. As much as I hate to admit it,, I really cared for him. To a point that I could never even understand.

I'm just sick of being betrayed. I'm sick of people intentionally hurting me, and others not necessarily meaning to but doing things they know will. It gets old. I hate this feeling. I hate the sinking feeling in my belly.

So my plan is to just remove myself from the situation. Its not my mess. I need to close the chapter, especially on those at my old job. I HATED that place and I feel like it was a waste of a year.. I met people I wish I could take back.

I'm sad, I'm angry and I'm incredibly hurt. I just need time to myself. I need to just blur out the past and move on..

Not to mention I'm already incredibly hurt by some of my friends i grew up with. I felt like I was just left behind.

So what I want to do is leave them all behind.

I'm done. I really am just done.