fat

One thing I have been stressed about is getting fat. I know that's very silly and stupid but I just want to feel good about myself. I don't need to be size 0 to feel happy. I just want to feel healthy and good.

Lately I have felt anything but.

Not only have I been sick for the past couple of months. On and off again sicknesses. But I have had relentless stomachaches. I'm a closet hypochondriac so I believe its a million sicknesses cancer, tumor, kidney failure ect. I even chalked it up to being pregnancy. Now I'd have to be like 4 or 5 months pregnant at this point.. and I'm about 99% sure I'm NOT pregnant, I feel like I would have had to have figured it out by now. But I'm just that bad of a hypochondriac that my mind went there. 

but honestly, I think I'm just gaining weight and I'm eating too much and too often.

Or I may have celiac and am allergic to gluten. Which is entirely possible

Which means I will have to go to the doctor.. ugh.

I hate the doctor.

I'm just so stressed out about getting fat, money, the future that I could just be making myself sick.

I'm at a loss here..

but in a lighter topic..

My mom made a comment about how big Ev was in her high chair compared to when we first got it. Well obviously there would be a difference because Ev was 4 months old when we got it and she is now 17 months old. but still. You just don't realize how fast babies grow up until you reflect back! I looked back through Ev's old pictures and the difference from then and now is amazing. I even took a side by side

Where oh where did my baby Go?