Makes sense sometimes

"Most people probably view the act of conception as merely a biological function. But it seems clear to me that on some level, spirits choose their parent, because these potential parents possess certain traits and values that the soon-to-be child needs to assimilate during his or her lifetime." -Anthony Kiedis

Sometimes I wonder why things happen the way they did. Sometimes I wonder where I went wrong. Maybe it wasn't something I did. Maybe there's a bigger reason to why it turned out like it did. Maybe it's a blessing, maybe its always meant to be hell.
For some unknown reason, I have Ev. For some unknown reason I did something I wouldn't have normally done with someone I normally wouldn't have hung out with. Yeah I suffer from my decision emotionally and even physically but I have Ev and I guess thats what makes all the pain and heartache I've endured worth it.
I want to be happy though and it's quite hard to be.

This quote explains why things are the way they are. It wasn't meant to be between us but Ev was meant to be mine. If it wasn't for that other half, Ev wouldn't be Ev. I don't understand why I had to suffer so much to get Ev but I guess the best gifts are the ones you work hardest for.